Effective Positive Parenting In The 21st Century
Parenting is a 24-hour job, but homeschooling, working from home, vaccination, isolation, and all the uncertainty surrounding COVID-19 has made it even more difficult.
All of us are dealing with extremely stressful atmospheres. It is taxing to work from home and also running the household for working parents. As a parent handling everything at this time, it's very easy to feel that you have so many roles to fulfil that you just can’t possibly perform all the time.
It is important to remind yourself that this is a unique situation that requires time to adjust. Here are some tips that can help you to effectively manage and handle your kids during these stressful times.
Managing behaviour problems
Often, when children misbehave, it’s their way of reacting to the amount of stress they’re facing and also their way to vent out their frustration.
It’s very important that you, as parents, act as role models. Start by managing your stress levels through adopting means like exercise, relaxation, journaling, or yoga. The calmer and more relaxed you are, the better you’ll be able to handle the child’s reactions to stress.
Here are some tips you can adopt to manage your child's negative behaviours:
- Redirect your child. If your child is misbehaving, redirect them to other activities that they like. It could include playing, reading a book, or watching a video. Distract them with interesting tasks before they get very restless and difficult to handle.
- Take a breath. Take deep breaths when you are losing patience with your child. You need to remain calm and logical when your child is angry. You can count to ten, or do back counting while deep breathing to allow yourself to calm down. In this particular manner, you can respond to your child’s behaviour in a calmer and more relaxed manner.
- Give your child creative consequences. If your child goes outside without a mask, reason out with him or her, as to why it is essential to wear a mask. Show your child videos or illustrations so that he gets that clarity, but creatively.
- Reward good behaviours. It will motivate them and help them perform better. Getting a positive reward in terms of praise, candy or even a star strengthens the behaviour and the child would feel like doing it again and again for the reward. This helps them to learn and modify behaviour patterns.
- Never yell at or spank your child. Losing your cool will only hamper the relationship and the child’s sense of safety. Instead, think of creative ways to modify their behaviour. For example, if they misbehave, they lose 20 mins of their screen time.
- Deep breaths and just ignore. Ignoring temper tantrums can be extremely effective. Children generally indulge in temper tantrums to gain attention and irritate the parent to the point of giving in. Don’t pay attention to such acts, this will help them realize that they should find a more respectful way of finding attention or should just let it go.
- Spend time with your child. Spending extra time with children helps to strengthen your bond with them. It helps them to open up to you and discuss things. There are many activities that a parent and child can do together.
- Cooking and eating together. Cooking meals along with them will act as an opportunity to talk more and know what’s going on in their life. You can give them small tasks that will help them to be more interested and engaged. Try to schedule dinners with the whole family. Make it a no-device zone and just interact.
- Doing their favourite hobby together. When you take interest in what your child likes to do, children generally feel happier with all the attention. Let them lead the task. This will act as a great way to boost their confidence and also improve your bond with them
- Help them fix a routine. The pandemic has disrupted the routine of children. To help them function better, it is important to have a clear and set schedule for them. You can make a balanced routine that includes academics, leisure, and playtime as well.
- Empathize with their frustrations. Be empathetic and lend listening ears towards their conversations, as they have been forced to give up on things due to the pandemic. Don’t invalidate their feelings and also listen without trying to convince them that they’ll be fine. Don’t communicate that others have it worse. Encourage them to be creative with how they interact virtually with their friends and also promise them that you will take them outside once the situation improves.
Due to the pandemic, we are all locked inside our homes. It is indeed a tough time for all of us, including our kids. No matter if you are working from home or not, it is highly advisable to spend some time with your kids too. You can access the self-help content available in our curated content library to learn more about work-life balance. You can even reach out and drop a message in HappiCHAT whenever you feel like venting and sharing your feelings.